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Tag Archive for: wedding

Interesting, ideas, Wedding

Why are wedding gowns white? A History

Elegant bride in white lace wedding dress holding a bouquet in a softly lit room.

Why are wedding gowns white?

It is perhaps the most iconic scene from any wedding day, the white wedding dress adorning the beaming bride. But why are wedding gowns white? And why do brides wear white? There is a huge number reasons, not in the least the fact that white is the brightest of colours, further enhancing the bride’s visibility on her big day, but it’s a tradition that has evolved over hundreds of years for a variety of reasons.

Alru Farm wedding bride
Alru Farm wedding bride

Why are wedding gowns white? A bit of history.

To be perfectly pedantic, the traditional colour of a modern white dress isn’t actually white, it’s more “Candlelight,” “Ivory,” “Ecru” or “Frost” when putting my graphic designer hat on.. But to the common layman, they all look like a white wedding dress, right? Anyway, the answer to the question of why are wedding dresses white all has to do with the popularity of some people who happened to wear white on their wedding day, and as a species who like to copy our idols, the fashion caught on and became tradition.

Victoria Albert Wedding
Victoria Albert Wedding

Queen Victoria

Queen Victoria of England who reigned from 1837-1901 was the first to make white wedding dresses fashionable by wearing a pale gown trimmed in orange blossoms for her 1840 wedding to her first cousin, Prince Albert. Naturally, because she was the queen and the center of all things high society at the time, whatever she wore, everyone tried to copy.

Kind of like how it is now with everything Kate Middleton, or any red carpet celebrity wears being reported on. As a bit of a side note here, Anne of Brittany also made white wedding dresses popular all the way back in 1499, believing that white was a symbol of virginity – despite being married once before. Royal brides also chose white as it was the most difficult solour to achieve using the washing methods of the day.

Before modern wedding gowns were made to be white by Queen Victoria’s wedding, it was quite common for wedding gowns to be any colour. In biblical times, blue (not white) represented purity, and the bride and groom would wear a blue band around the bottom of their wedding attire, contributing to the poem of ‘Something old, something new, something borrowed, something BLUE’.

Blue wedding dress
Blue wedding dress

The Traditional Colour used to be Blue!

Generally though, before Queen Victoria made it a tradition to wear a white wedding gown as a bride, the most common item of clothing a bride would wear was simply what her favourite, or best garment she had available to her and could be any color, even black. To convince her groom that she came from a wealthy family, brides would also pile on layers of fur, silk and velvet.

This was partly due to the fact that the more layers of clothing one wore meant the less body odor people were able to smell, being that bathing was not something people did often in those days.

The Manor Basket Range Wedding
Newlyweds share a tender moment under a veil, bathed in soft sunlight, during an outdoor wedding.

In Modern times

Today though, the answer to the question of ‘why are wedding gowns white?’ seems to be primarily because in modern society the colour symbolises innocence, purity and certainly makes the bride stand out in a crowd, like the princess she’s made out to be on her wedding day. It may also be just ‘because’, as that’s what everyone else does right? It’s tradition! 🙂

Everything on a wedding day has some sort of roots in tradition, some going back thousands of years – others being quite a modern occurance. The fact is that the answer to the question ‘why are wedding gowns white?’ is simply because people today associate this with brides and this hasn’t changed since 1840. Perhaps in another 200 years, wedding dresses may be purple? Who knows?

September 5, 2016
ideas, Wedding

Wedding dress shopping tips

As I’m currently getting ready for my own wedding this October, I’ve been in an interesting position where I’ve been putting all my experience and knowledge that’s come from years of being a professional wedding photographer into planning my own wedding. Today I’d like to share some tips concerning wedding dress shopping. Now obviously I’m not completely privy to what goes on in the mostly female domain that is wedding dress shopping, but I do know what my own fiance and plenty of my clients have said and commented on in regards to the subject.

Wedding dress shopping tips
Wedding dress shopping tips

Wedding dress shopping tips

Wedding dress shopping is very exciting for the bride and her family so you’ve really got to take time and prepare for the decision. Before you go out and start trying on gowns and getting attached, please keep these tips in the back of your mind.

Don’t take too many people

Everyone has their own opinion, but the only opinion that should matter would be your own, and perhaps your mother as she’d probably be just as invested in your choice as you are. Dragging along your entire bridal party, your friends and their dogs aren’t going to help the decision process at all. in fact it will hamper it. If you like something and it’s obtainable, go for it, don’t let too many people have a say in your decision.

Mobile phone photos of Bride
Mobile phone photos of Bride

Don’t decide too early, but also don’t leave it too late!

If you find a gown that you love 12 months out from your wedding, that’s great! But just be aware the more dresses and styles you discover and look at will influence your tastes further down the road. What happens if they change so much you don’t like it on the big day? Take your time, and just make sure you have enough time between now and your wedding day for alterations. On that point don’t leave your gown shopping too late! Alterations on wedding gowns can take a crazy long time and it’s no good unfinished.

Make appointments

Many in-demand bridal boutiques are appointment only, so make sure the store you’re planning on visiting takes appointments and make one if need be. These places take appointments for the same reason doctors do, so as to devote their time to you and you alone. Make sure you inform them on how many people will be attending also, just so they can cater to your party as best they can. Also try to paint a picture on the style of gown you’d be after. That way they can sort out a small pre selection of gowns for you to try, streamlining the process.

Wedding dress
Wedding dress

Budget?

Wedding gowns can range from $99 to $99,000, be sure to stick to your budget or you may find yourself in the ER ward once you see the bill. It’s easy to forget your budget when you’re considering your bridal gown as it’s such a emotional moment and many people will give the advice to ‘splurge’. But there’s ‘spluging’ and being downright reckless in regards to your budget, and believe me wedding gown bills can really hurt. Before you set-foot into any boutique, know how much you want to spend and tell the shop assistant your budget. This would also help with being swayed by the amazing bargain of 70% off, or the horrible cheap dresses that look good online but in reality are glorified fancy dress costumes.

Wear what you’d wear on your wedding day

Underwear lines tend to stand out quite a bit in wedding photography, and anytime really, so when wedding dress shopping, please go shopping for suitable underwear first! Try to match the colour of your dress also, whites and ivory colours usually suit, but I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to point it out ot a bride while being prepared. Also consider your shoes, wearing high heels will make you taller, wearing flipflops may cause the hem to get dirty. Try to wear something similar to what you’d wear on your day, if not your actual wedding shoes.

August 17, 2016
ideas, Interesting, Wedding

Modern wedding etiquette

As someone who really enjoys attending weddings, and have attended close to 100 weddings over my career as a wedding photographer, I’m a bit of a sucker for some of the more traditional aspects of weddings. I’ve blogged in the past about the historic origins of some of the more well known wedding traditions, such as the origin of the best man and bridal party, even saying like ‘tying the knot’. But what I’ve noticed over the past few years are a few changes to modern wedding etiquette. Such things like smartphones, hash-tags and things like photo booths just are not steeped in tradition, and yet are fast becoming an integral part of the modern wedding.

Modern wedding etiquette

Unplugged weddings?

Your wedding photographs are going to be your lasting window enabling you to revisit the memories of emotion and joy that was your wedding day, which is kind of why having a professional wedding photographer there on the day is one of the most important additions to your day. Having a professional wedding photographer and videographer there on your day shows that you care about your images, and lasting memories, so chances are you’d like them to look your best right? A common form of modern wedding etiquette I’ve noticed is the rise of the ‘unplugged wedding’ whereby, the bride and groom instructs each of their guests not to use their own phones or cameras in order for their paid photographer to best do their job. This allows for better scenes from your wedding photographer not having to contend with ipads in their face all day, and also your guests can enjoy your wedding, without having to worry about getting their phone out to grab their own shots.

Mobile phone photos of Bride
Mobile phone photos of Bride

All hail the #hashtag!

If there is nothing else on this list, it has to be the hashtag, a lot of people reading thins may still not realise what a hashtag is, or even does. Basically, having a unique hashtag developed for your wedding allows your guests to share any photos, video or comments on-line, via any form of social media by adding your hashtag to the description section. This is of course if you’re not having an ‘unplugged’ wedding :). Then via the magic of the internet, all that content gets amalgamated for your viewing. It’s actually quite incredible, and insanely convenient as it saves you chasing up after every single guests for their photos. To make one, simply take say your names (ie Bob and Belinda) and stick a hashtag (#) in front of them so perhaps #Bobbelinda, or #Bobandbelinda. Anywhere you type that on social media, it will turn into a link, which you can press and see what other people have also used that hashtag for.

Either gender in the bridal party

It is entirely not uncommon these days for members of either gender to play a role in either the groom, or the bride’s entourage. Traditionally members of the grooms men were restricted to men, and the bridal party to women, however in the age of equality, it is quite accepted to have members of either gender representing either the bride or groom. Some weddings I’ve been to actually don’t differentiate the grooms men and bridal party at all, but rather have one big group.

Bridal party
Bridal party

Who pays?

With the cost of an average wedding in Australia being a very hefty $36,200, it’s usually  part of modern wedding etiquette to share the costs involved with hosting a wedding. Traditionally it was the bride’s family that foot the bill, however, with the average age of couples that are getting married nearing 30, they are usually living by themselves and financially independent. This said however, due to the modern huge expense a wedding can represent, often the parents of both sides of the family will chip in a decent amount, and then it’s also not uncommon for guests to contribute through wedding gifts that simply amount to cash.

Wedding gifts

Leading on from who pays for a wedding, it’s considered pretty standard modern wedding etiquette to simply ask for cash in lieu of more traditional wedding gifts to help pay for the wedding. This is usually done by placing a ‘wishing well’ or something similar at the wedding reception where guests can add a card, lined with cash instead of a gift. It was traditional that guests were to buy gifts to help the newly wed couple set up their home together, but it’s not not done as much.

Wishing well
Wishing well

Update that facebook status!

If you’re keen on social media, like the majority of young newly weds, then you’d better update that relationship status on the day of your wedding! If you don’t be prepared for all of your guests continually pestering you to do so. Facebook has become a website that contains all the information you’d usually find out through polite conversation, and relationship status is one of those pieces of information that has become something that everyone can know by looking you up first. This can be a good and bad thing depending on how you feel about sharing your information on-line. But if you do, you’d better update your status!

Listen to the couple’s wishes

Along this same vein though, perhaps the newly wedded couple are planning on keeping their new relationship status a secret, for whatever reason. In which case it;s not unusual for them to request no images or anything relating to the wedding be put up on social media until they say it’s ok. It’s a part of modern wedding etiquette that can have huge ramifications regarding relationships between friends, family and even media. So be sure to listen to their desires and perhaps hold off from congratulating the newly weds for a little bit until they say it’s ok.

Mobile phone
Mobile phone

There are plenty more aspects to modern wedding etiquette that I simply cant list in one article, including use of websites, clothing, bringing kids and dates. But I felt that what I’ve listed so far are perhaps the most modern of modern wedding etiquette trends that I’ve come across during my career. Feel free to discuss any of it in a comment below!

August 4, 2016
ideas, Wedding

Ring warming ceremony

Close-up of wedding rings nestled in moss within a elegant glass gift box.

Have a Ring Warming Ceremony at your Wedding

A ring warming ceremony is a delightful modern wedding custom, developed in Ireland with the goal of developing a secular wedding tradition that didn’t draw on religious ideals in order to pass on the notion of love and belief of the gathering congregation towards the bride and groom. The basic idea is that your wedding rings are ‘warmed’ by each member of your congregation by having each of them hold your rings for a certain amount of time. Hence the name ‘ring warming ceremony’.

Wedding rings
Wedding rings

How to hold a ring warming ceremony

Generally a ring warming ceremony takes place just before, or during your wedding ceremony. One way is if you do not have a gigantic congregation, your celebrant, generally at the beginning of your ceremony, directs all the guests present to pass your rings around, and have them hold your rings to ‘warm’ them with their love and well wishes. Obviously if you have hundreds of guests, this really isn’t a viable option, so another option is to have your rings stationed some place at the front of your ceremony, with all your guests invited to hold them as they enter. A third option is to simply limit the number of people who participate in the ring warming ceremony, perhaps only having your parents and bridal party participate.

Exchanging wedding rings
Exchanging wedding rings

Things to consider

It’s a good idea to ask someone you trust to look after the rings, if you opt to have your ring warming before the ceremony proper, this duty could be given to the best man, who’s job traditionally is to safe guard the rings anyway. If you choose to have them passed around, it just pays to have someone dedicated to watching them, after all they should be destined for your fingers!

Tell your guests about it also, a ring warming ceremony is still quite a new wedding tradition, so chances are not many of your guests will know what one is. It’s a good idea to perhaps have your celebrant work the explanation into his speech, or even add details about it in your wedding invitations.

Think about how long the ceremony would take. I mentioned before that sometimes handing your rings around a huge congregation wouldn’t be particularly smart, considering you’d be potentially waiting at the altar for your rings to reappear after the procession.

Consider tying your rings together, and possibly attaching them to something like a pillow, or box. One downside of this otherwise well-meaning and beautiful ceremony showing family love is that your rings will be moving around a large area, with the possibility of them being dropped and lost. Particularly if your wedding is taking place outside. Having them attached to something larger will minimise this risk.

Wedding rings
Wedding rings

The idea of a ring warming ceremony is that your wedding rings have been ‘warmed’ forever by the well wishes and positive thoughts of each of your guests. This is a wonderfully personal way to get your guests involved in your wedding ceremony, rather than simply turning up 🙂

July 27, 2016
Interesting, Wedding

‘Tying the Knot’ – History

‘Tying the Knot’ or to ‘tie the knot’ is a saying synonymous with getting married to day, but where does it come from? It’s funny thinking about these types of saying we use on a daily basis, not really knowing where they originate from, but gleefully use them without thinking about what they really mean. In the case of ‘Tying the Knot’ however it’s no where near as dark as the origin of the tradition of having a Best Man, it’s actually quite nice 🙂 I was thinking about the origin of the saying as I have just become engaged myself, and we announced it on Facebook using an image we produced together of a tied knot in between our hands.

Tying the knot
Tying the knot

Origin of the saying ‘Tying the knot’

In the US, the saying ‘let’s get hitched’ refers to the practice of ‘hitching’ up your horse as you go to town, or tying a knot in a rope to keep your horse from trotting away. In the same vein the idea was that ‘getting hitched’ was tying a knot between the two newly weds, or in some people’s minds, tying a lady down like a horse so she wouldn’t get away. Because of this, the saying ‘Tying the knot’ is commonly, incorrectly attributed to this practice.

The term ‘Tie the Knot’ came from an earlier time, during the Renaissance in a ceremony called “Handfasting”. ‘Handfast’ and its variations are defined in the Oxford English dictionary as “to make a contract (of marriage) between parties by joining of hands.” Kind of like a handshake. This could also be interpreted today as a proposal of marriage for a specific period of time, traditionally a year and a day. the notion of marriage by the way has not always been an eternal one, with marriages in the past being made for  “a year and a day,” “a lifetime”, “for all of eternity” or “for as long as love shall last” depending on your vows.

Handfasting
Handfasting

The old way in Great Britain for couples to pledge their betrothal was for them to join hands, his right to her right, his left to her left, so from above they looked like an infinity symbol. ‘Handfastings’, which is an ancient word for ‘wedding’ were traditional before weddings became a legal function of governments or formal religions in the early 1500’s. The very word ‘Handfasting’ derived its origin from the custom of tying the the bride and groom’s hands and wrists together. In this period of time, it’s actually quite interesting to note that during the traditional period of time for a wedding of ‘a year and a day’ or 13 moon cycles, the bride was referred to as a Virgin, or ‘a woman not owned by a man’. It was after this period of time that, if the marriage survived that long, longer vows could be taken.

So there you go! Another wedding history tidbit from my research of the history of the modern wedding!

July 21, 2016
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